I am a sojourner on the earth. I used to say it was my grandma’s fault.
When I was young she bought me a subscription to National Geographic. When I saw photos and read about those people in far away places, I was smitten with wanderlust.
Those magazines opened to me the door on the wide world and I wanted to set out.
Thirty years and thousands of miles later, not much has changed. I am a sojourner – a stranger in a strange land – but not because I live in Mexico instead of my native Oklahoma. I’m not quite at home in Mexico, but I don’t quite belong in Oklahoma either.
Every time I go home, I’m reminded of that. Every Christmas, especially. Starting around Thanksgiving, I have nostalgic fits leading up to my departure for Oklahoma.
Then I get home…and it’s not quite how I imagined it. Not that home isn’t wonderful, but it somehow falls short of the anticipation…every time.
Then I found that C.S. Lewis had already explained my letdown better than I could ever articulate. These homecomings are just shadows of a true homecoming for which my soul longs, Lewis writes.
“…They are only the scent of a flower we have not found, the echo of a tune we have not heard, news from a country we have never yet visited.”
When it comes down to it, what I really want is to get back into Eden.
I feel the Fall in every sweet ache of my heart for adventure, for love, for home. I hear the whisper of its song in every story where mercy and truth have met one another, where justice and peace have kissed.
I stand just this side of the angel with the flaming sword and my soul groans.
I’m not the first to call myself a sojourner on the earth. Not even close. But as an exile among the exiled, the least I can do is try to put the memories of that true home into words and hum a few bars of that barely audible melody for those who care to listen.
Yeah. And the words sing. They sing sad and hopeful tunes.
completely love it, didnt know you could write like this. 🙂
Thanks. Won’t always be musings here. I want to write about the obra en Guerrero as well.
Words from deep within our soul communicates to the same depth within us. Thanks for finding and writing what I think and thought.